The Adventures of Garfield and Rapunzel
by Fluffy the Pitbull
Summary: A pretty Siamese cat sneaks into Garfield's house to steal food. When he catches her at it, she convinces him to accompany her on her quest to right the injustices of the world.
1. A Noble Quest

  
It was a lazy summer day. The spiders were hidden away somewhere, Odie was out for a walk with Jon, and Garfield was napping on the couch in the living room. This much the pretty Siamese cat had ascertained already. Now was her chance. She jumped quietly through an open kitchen window, and approached the cupboards. She sniffed around, trying to figure out which door hid the most tempting prize. Finally, she smelled the cat food. The door came open with a few scratches, and she pulled the bag of food onto the counter. She ripped the bag open, and proceeded to scarf it down.   
  
Garfield woke up with a start. Had he heard a noise? Yes, there it was again, coming from the kitchen. Maybe Jon was home. Garfield was feeling a little hungry, so he stretched and yawned and went into the kitchen. *Hey!* Garfield jumped up beside the Siamese, scaring her enough that she fell onto the floor. She landed on her feet, and made as if to dash for the door. Garfield jumped in front of her. *What were you doing in my food?*  
  
*Please, please, Sir, let me go. I'll never do it again!*  
  
Garfield was kind of pleased to be called Sir, but he was still angry about the food. *You know what's going to happen now? Jon is going to get home, and blame me for that, and it will be all your fault. You think I'm going to take the rap for you? If you do, you're sadly mistaken.*  
  
*I'm sorry, really I am, but... what will he do to you?*  
  
*Do? Nothing too terrifying--after all, I've got Jon pretty much under my thumb. Still, it's the principle of the thing.*  
  
*Come with me! Then you won't have to worry about this Jon. I am on a great quest, full of adventure. I am going to right the wrongs of the world...*  
  
*Thanks, but I'm not exactly a save-the-world kind of guy.* Garfield glanced back at the spilled food. *You can go, I think I'll finish that bag off. I'm going to be blamed for it anyway.*  
  
The Siamese seemed not to hear him. *...I will be recognized as a hero, and kings will hang medals around my neck. They will call me Rapunzel the Magnificent!*  
  
*And they'll call me Garfield the Great!* Crowns, screaming fans, silk cushions, and gourmet meals flashed through Garfield's mind. *I will go with you. I changed my mind. I'm a hero at heart.*  
  
Rapunzel purred ecstatically. *I'm so glad! I always wished for a companion on my quest!*  
  
*Well, let's finish that cat food, and you can tell me all about this quest thing.* The two of them made short work of the food, and Rapunzel explained that she wandered around, and whenever she saw something that was wrong, she stepped in to save the world. Soon she would be recognized for her wonderful deeds, but for now she was pretty much on her own. Or, now that it was the two of them, they were on their own.  
  
Garfield ate the last bit of cat foot and sat back to look at Rapunzel. *So how long do you figure it'll be until the medals and TV interviews and stuff?*  
  
*Oh, not long at all. We'll practically be superheroes.*  
  
*Sounds good to me. Let's go.* They jumped out the window that Rapunzel had gotten in by, and saw Jon and Odie coming down the street. Garfield grabbed Rapunzel by the scruff of her neck and pulled her behind some trash cans. Jon and Odie went in the house without noticing them, and they heard Jon discover the empty cat food bag.  
  
"Garfield! Bad cat! Where are you hiding?"  
  
One of the spiders scuttled across the top of the trashcan nearest to Garfield. *Hey, not so high and mighty now, are you?* Wordlessly, Garfield flipped the trash can cover over on it's back, partly crushing the spider. He smiled contentedly.  
  
Rapunzel was horrified. *How could you do that to that poor spider? You're a terrible, terrible--*  
  
*Rapunzel, relax. That spider was a spy for the rebellion.*  
  
*What's the rebellion?*  
  
*Um, it's an evil force, organized to, uh, commit injustices.*  
  
*Oh.*  
  
*Yes. It's very dangerous to oppose them.*  
  
Rapunzel looked into Garfield's eyes, and purred. *You're so brave! My hero.* It seemed like she meant it, too.  
  
*Ahem. Yes, well (cough cough) anything for the cause.*  
  
Rapunzel looked ready to melt. She sighed blissfully. *Oh, Garfield!* The sound of Jon searching for his cat came to them through the open window, and Rapunzel pulled herself together. *Let's go! We don't want that Jon to find us and stop us from saving the world.*  
  
Garfield assented, and they took off across the yard and down the street. 


	2. In Defense of Mice

It was beginning to get dark when Garfield and Rapunzel came to a large barn. With their combined strength, they managed to pry the door open. They went inside to see about staying there for the night, and found a nest of baby mice. Rapunzel was enchanted. Garfield was hungry. Neither of them had time to act out their feelings however, because at that moment a big farm dog snuck through the open barn door. He headed straight for the nest of mice. Rapunzel flung herself in the way and started clawing at the dog's face. *Garfield! Help me! We must save the darling little mice!*  
  
Garfield reluctantly joined in the fray, and the three of them made quite a comotion. The cats were just getting the upper hand when the barn door was thrown wide. A racous voice sounded, stopping the fighting animals cold. "Bowsah! Get ovah heah, stupid dawg!" The dog went to the man, turning only to glare back at his opponents. The farmer spat a stream of foul brown liquid into the hay. "Nahw you cats git outa heah! Gwan, git!" Garfield pushed Rapunzel toward the door. She looked back quickly at the mice, hidden by all the hay they'd kicked up. The farmer swung the door shut behind them, and they fled down the dirt road before the dog could come after them again.  
  
Rapunzel and Garfield kept going until they were on the highway. They at last settled for the night on the road's shoulder. There was a piece of old, rusted fender turned up like a cup. Rapunzel looked at it hopefully. *Maybe dew will collect in that overnight. I'm so thirsty!*   
  
*Yeah, I didn't think of dew. I guess that means we'll be wet tonight.* Garfield sighed. Rapunzel nodded sadly.  
  
They sat there for a few moments, licking their wounds. *So, this is what it's like to right the injustices of the world, huh?*  
  
*Yes, far too often. I only hope that those cute little mice will be okay. At least we saved them.*  
  
Garfield refrained from pointing out that if it weren't for them opening the barn door the mice wouldn't have been in danger in the first place. He was beginning to wonder if this hero thing was the best route to fame, after all. 


	3. Picked Up

There was a clap of thunder, a flash of lightening, and Garfield and Rapunzel woke up in the pouring rain. The upside was that the fender filled quickly, and the cats drank all they wanted. Now they were just wet. There was no shelter anywhere around. *Maybe there's a bridge or something up the road?* Rapunzel looked hopeful.  
  
*Yeah. With my luck, it'll stop raining just when we find one.* Garfield looked up at the black sky.  
  
Rapunzel sighed. *Well, at least we can look.*  
  
Garfield nodded dismally, and the two of them set off down the highway's shoulder. A light suddenly came at them out of the night, and there was the sound of tires squealing on the wet asphalt. A run-down old pickup truck stopped just short of the two cats.  
  
The passenger door swung open, and a harried female voice called out to them. "Are you okay, kitties? Come on, I don't wanna come out there. Are you okay? Here, kitty kitty. Come here, have a ride?"  
  
Rapunzel looked at Garfield, and shrugged. In another moment she was in the truck's cab. Garfield was right behind her. The driver, a pretty, auburn-haired woman wearing big torquois earings, reached over and slammed the door behind them. The truck started up with a jerk, and Rapunzel dug her claws into the seat to keep from slipping. The cab was a mess, littered with used take-out containers, old newspapers, loose playing cards, and empty Coke cans. A pair of balding fuzzy dice hung from the rear-view mirror. Peering out the back window, Garfield could see that the truck's bed was no better: it was awash with nails, bits of tarp, and pieces of wood and metal in varying sizes.   
  
"You know," the woman said, "I used to have cats." She glanced at Rapunzel. "Like you. We probably had ten or fifteen hanging around the old place. A long time ago, now... But where are my manners? I'm Emiline, and this old truck is called Rover." Emiline laughed. "I must be crazy. Introducing myself to a couple of strays."  
  
She paused, and peered out the windshield at the rain. "I guess I might've been crazy all along, from some people's angle. I named Rover, didn't I? And I've been talking to him until you two came along. But I don't see it like that, like I'm crazy. I'm just lonely, is all."  
  
*Sure. Lonely. Right.* Garfield glanced at Rapunzel. *Of all the cars on the road, we had to get picked up by a lunatic.*  
  
"Well, make yourselves at home. It's nice to have somebody around, even if you can't talk to me, I can talk to you. Sometimes all you need is for somebody to look like they're listening. You know?"  
  
Rapunzel looked up at her encouragingly. Garfield settled down and went to sleep. 


	4. Thievery

Garfield woke to the smell of tuna. He blinked his eyes open and looked around. Rapunzel was eating from a can, and Emiline set another before him. She picked up a grinder from its place beside the coke bottle on her dashboard. She smiled as Garfield stretched. "Finally awake, huh? That was quite the nap." The sun shone bright outside, warming the cab.  
  
"So, as I was telling your girlfriend, we're pretty well set here. Check it out." She pulled a wad of bills in a red rubber band from her pocket. "I have dozens of these. The glove box is full of them. Do you want to know how I got them? I stole them. I steal everything. It's my one character flaw. I'm a klepto. Want to know something else? I don't even use them. You're eating stolen tuna fish, buddy." It didn't seem to phase Garfield. Rapunzel looked puzzled, and turned to him.  
  
*Would stealing count as an injustice?*  
  
He shook is head, and licked the tuna can. *No. Definitely not. Never. Actually, stealing food is a very noble thing to do.*  
  
*Really?*  
  
*Oh, yeah. It's right up there with...um...with opposing the revolution. You know, the spiders and stuff.*  
  
"So, keeping that in mind, we should really get going." Emiline started the truck and peeled out onto the road. "Oh, I'm not worried about them. Those losers will probably never notice what I took. But there is a certain gentleman that I don't really want to catch up with me. We had a little disagreement over a gold watch. Want to see it?" She leaned over to the glove box, pulled out an elaborate pocket watch, and dropped it between the cats. "Nice, huh? Mafia guys have the coolest stuff." Garfield looked at her in horror. Rapunzel noticed, and looked even more confused.  
  
*I thought you said stealing was noble.*  
  
*Well, uh, stealing FOOD is noble, most stealing is just neutral. But stealing from the Mafia is bad. Very bad.*  
  
*Is it an injustice?*  
  
*Er..uh...yes.*  
  
*Then we must stop her!*  
  
*I mean no! No! Not an injustice, nothing to stop, really, just not something to be associated with, if you know--*  
  
*If it's not an injustice, what's wrong with it?*  
  
*Rapunzel, there's this thing called danger...*  
  
Rapunzel beamed. *I know all about danger! It's very noble! Is the Mafia in danger?*  
  
Garfield sighed and shook his head. There was no reasoning with this cat. The truck jerked to a stop at a red light. Emiline glanced out the back window nervously, and fingered the watch. She looked at Garfield worriedly, then suddenly her face lit up. She pulled him over onto her lap and started wrapping the watch's chain around his collar.  
  
"Hold still, kitty. I'm going to let you out here, and I want you to go away, you hear me?" She glanced out the window again. "I'm a kleptomaniac, not a masochist. If I haven't got it maybe they'll believe I didn't take it." She hooked the clasp and opened the passenger door. "Go on, get out there."  
  
The cats jumped down and ran to the shoulder as the truck squealed away. 


	5. Fluffy the Pitbull

[A/N: Welcome! This chapter contains my Mary Sue, Fluffy. You have been warned.]  
  
Garfield and Rapunzel wandered away from the highway, through the woods. It was almost noon when they came upon a large pitbull asleep on the ground. Garfield was all for letting sleeping dogs lie, but Rapunzel had other ideas. *Do you think she's all right? Out here all alone...* She poked her gently.  
  
The pitbull woke up with half a snarl and glanced at the cats. Rapunzel smiled reassuringly. *Good morning, doggie.*  
  
The pitbull stood up and shook herself. *I'm Fluffy, the friendly pitbull. Who are you?* She glanced at the watch still hanging from Garfield's collar.  
  
*I'm Rapunzel, and this is Garfield, and we're out to right the injustices of the world! And we just wanted to make sure you're all right. You looked so lonely, sleeping here all alone.*  
  
Fluffy looked down sadly. *Yes, I am lonely. I'm a very social pitbull, really, but all my friends ran away and left me when I told them I was part golden retriever.*  
  
A tear rolled down Rapunzel's face. *That's so s-s-sad!*  
  
Garfield was a little more skeptical. *So why are you in the middle of the woods?*  
  
*That's the worst part. You see, my owner didn't realize that I was part golden retriever either, and as soon as he knew he abandoned me here! Now I have no one...*  
  
*This is definitely an injustice, isn't it Garfield? You can come with us, Fluffy. We'll be your friends, and you can fight injustices with us.*  
  
*Oh, that would be wonderful! But...will I hinder your work? I really want to do good things for the world.*  
  
*You will do good things, Fluffy, don't worry about a thing!*  
  
Much as Garfield loved soap operas (they say laughter is the best medicine) it would have been a little rude for him to point and guffaw just now. Normally rudeness didn't bother him, but around a full-grown pitbull/golden retriever things take on a whole new significance. So instead he suggested that they should get going before it started to rain. Fluffy looked a little puzzled, since there wasn't a cloud in the sky, but Rapunzel went along happily.  
  
Fluffy explained that she knew of an abandoned shed where they could get out of the storm, and she and Rapunzel chatted happily as she led the way. Garfield followed them, hoping that this dog could find some food, too.  
  
It didn't take them long to find a building, but it looked more like a house than a shed. The back door hung open, though, and there were no signs of life, so they went in. The kitchen they found themselves in was dingy and dark to eyes just come in from the sun. Light streamed through to open door, illuminating the dust. The one window was grimy and nearly covered with a coarse black curtain.  
  
The cupboards along the floor were easily opened, and had fresh sushi piled in the back. Rapunzel and Garfield went in to the food. But only a few bites had been taken before the nearest cupboard door slammed behind them, and they heard Fluffy outside barking. They flew at the doors, and tumbled out into the kitchen, brightly lit by a ceiling light.  
  
The room's doors were closed and Fluffy stood next to a man. Fluffy stopped barking, and the man grabbed at Garfield's collar. Garfield eluded him, only to be pinned down by Fluffy's jaws. Quickly, the man took the collar with the watch from around his neck. He opened the outside door, and booted the cats out. Rapunzel looked back at Fluffy, who stood menacing in the doorway. *I thought you were lost and alone!* she sobbed. *How could you do this to us?*  
  
Fluffy snarled. *Stupid cats! Never trust a pitbull named Fluffy.*  
  
[A/N: The quote "Never trust a pitbull named Fluffy" is not mine. I found it somewhere on the internet, and it's where I get my author name.] 


	6. Wal-Mart

Garfield and Rapunzel turned away from the house, and made their way through the woods. Dusk was falling when they found themselves on the edge of a large parking lot. At the very far end of the lot a huge plastic sign on a building declared that they had made it to Wal-Mart.  
  
They started across the parking lot, weaving through the parked cars until only a strip of pavement stood between them and the sidewalk. They started across it, and were about halfway when a buick turned a nearby corner and bore down on them. Garfield dashed forward, but Rapunzel hesitated and tried to go back.  
  
There was a dull thud, the driver slammed on the brakes, and the car stopped over the Siamese's still form.  
  
A boy in ragged jeans and a white cut-off tee-shirt dashed out of the store and knelt beside the car, pulling Rapunzel out from under it. The driver had gotten out and stood helplessly beside him. "Is it going to be all right?"  
  
The boy glanced up, angry hazel eyes taking in the woman's business suit and made-up face at a glance. "What do you care? If you cared about anything you wouldn't be driving that environment-butchering car!" He pointed at her accusingly. "We're all dying because of you, corporate America! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!"  
  
He scooped up Rapunzel, grabbed Garfield by the scruff of the neck and tucked him under his arm, staggered up, and took off running.  
  
He ran around Wal-Mart and up onto the highway shoulder. He followed the highway for some time before dashing away through the underbrush. Finally he came to a big white house with flaking paint and dropped Garfield to frantically pump the doorbell. Garfield had just started to clean himself when he was grabbed again and carried into a white, sterile room. It looked suspiciously like a veterinarian's clinic. There was a tall, bald man there who was dressed suspiciously like a veterinarian. The boy flopped Rapunzel onto a metallic table that looked suspiciously familiar. Garfield was, thankfully, left alone. He sat in the corner, cleaning himself and looking around to see if there was any food here. There didn't seem to be.  
  
The tall man examined Rapunzel, making lots of concerned noises. The boy was explaining how he found her. "...And then this businesswoman comes out of nowhere in a big ugly CAR and BAM! One down, but you could see she was kind of dissappointed she missed the other one. Then she tries to act concerned. Concerned! Like I couldn't see what she was! So then I..."  
  
The man sighed and put a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Hush, Rob. The cats need rest. They do not need you to disturb them with your anger, justified as it is."  
  
Rob hung his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother her, but they make me so mad!"  
  
"I know, and that is as it should be, but now get things for the cats to stay the night in here. I will see to the wounded one."  
  
Rob nodded and left the room. The man turned back to Rapunzel, tears forming in his eyes. Garfield finished cleaning himself and went to sleep. 


End file.
